By M. Nadhif Khalyani
Setiap orang ingin mencari sandaran saat jiwanya rapuh. Tak terkecuali orang tua.
Perselisihan pun tak urung juga terjadi pada beliau berdua.
Mereka, Orang terbaik dalam hidup kita, tetap memiliki sisi manusia biasa, yang kadang perlu bicara, disupport dan didengarkan.
Namun menjadi membingungkan jika ibu curhat kepada anak tentang ayah, dan ayah curhat kepada anak tentang ibu.
Hasbunalloh..
Bagi anak yang matang jiwanya, ia akan melihat peluang amal kebaikan untuk mengishlah keduanya.
Bagi anak yang jiwanya siap menjadi payung, dia bersyukur karena beliau berdua tidak mengumbar keluh kesah pada orang lain.
Bagi anak yang mau memahami dengan jernih, ia akan bersyukur karena curhat keduanya itu berarti beliau melihat bhw sang anak memiliki mata air yang bisa menyejukkan, memiliki payung untuk berteduh ditengah perselisihan.
Kejernihan hatinya, mampu melihat perselisihan itu dengan adil. Ia mampu mengarahkan, tanpa berpihak, tanpa memberikan jugde kepada salah satu pihak
Namun bagi anak yang tidak siap…
Maka ia tumbuh dg kebingungan, ia resah sebagaimana keduanya resah. Ia mencari pegangan sebagaimana kedua org tuanya mencari pegangan
Ia akan merasakan dirinya adalah wadah sampah untuk berkeluh kesah.
Keduanya nampak sbg org tua yang lemah, hingga berujung hilangnya kewibawaan keduanya.
Bahkan tanpa disadari, pelan pelan hilang dan sulit untuk menumbuhkan rasa syukur…
Apa akibatnya?
Sang anak merekam setiap goresan emosi yang dirasakan keduanya. Bukan hanya peristiwa peristiwanya saja.
Jika ia gagal mencerna dan memilah, mungkin ia akan larut dalam kekecewaan. Terkurung dalam kesedihan, dan terjebak untuk memihak, ikut membenci salah satu pihak.
Tidak hanya berhenti disitu…
Ia akan “kehilangan” pribadi ayah dan pribadi ibu yang diharapkan.
Anak ini hidup dalam bayang bayang ingatan buruk tentang kedua orang tuanya…
Bayangan itu kadang menghantui kehidupan keluarganya sendiri….saat pasangannya dan anak anaknya. Mempengaruhi emosinya, “daya tahannya”, hingga cara dalam menyelesaikan masalah.
Dinamika hubungan orang tua dan anak itu penuh pernik.
Perlu kejernihan hati untuk diam sejenak, berkaca, merenung sebelum memperbaiki apa yang telah terjadi.
Semoga Alloh limpahkan taufiqNYA untuk kita berbenah. Aamiin
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